Tag: Happy New Year

Happy New Year. It’s a blank canvas. What will we paint—doom or delight?  

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It’s nearly two weeks into the New Year and should be a time of possibilities. But I hear a lot of pessimism around me. “It’s going to be a horrible year”, “The economy’s cratering”, “We’re going to hell in a handbasket”, and “Why can’t we agree on anything?” are some of the laments that capture the zeitgeist of our times.

Writing that made me think of John Laurie as the ineffably dour Scot, Private Wilson in Dad’s Army, “We’re doomed!”.

I don’t exactly disagree with the zeitgeist. Or, at least, the we are doomed part of it. I had an uplifting, positively cheery conversation just before Christmas with another bright-eyed Tigger-type friend, and we agreed that it’s time to talk ourselves down from our collective perch of pessimism and back onto our “high-flying discs” (Abraham Hicks).

Pessimism on purpose

For sure, it’s a cold, complicated world out there. But it’s also a wonderful place if we see it that way. We don’t have to be Private Wilson. After all, it’s a new year. A blank canvas. I get that 1 January is just a number—a day like any other day. But symbolically, it’s so much more. It’s an opportunity to forgive ourselves for previous false starts and failures. A moment to take stock. To review, recharge and re-set. Not just to rinse and repeat.

In a previous blog, I wrote about the German idea of Zweckspressimus. Great word, don’t you think? It’s one of those complicated German compounds which translates as something like pessimism on purpose. In other words, the attitude of expecting the worst to feel relief when the worst doesn’t happen. This outlook is undoubtedly one way of coping in a very uncertain world, but it seems like the sort of vibe we should avoid, like the plague. Surely, we should be going hard out for the opposite — what can go right will go right?

Optimism is an inspiring fellow traveller

If we can talk ourselves into a black hole of negativity and pessimism, can’t we talk ourselves into a different place? We can push out positive energy and have great expectations and aspirations. If enough of us step away from the cliff face of doom and look up and out at what might be, in a good way, perhaps this world of ours wouldn’t look so grim.

My life is at a crossroads, and I’m not sure what will come at me in 2025. I’m a bit anxious, to be honest. Last year, I made significant changes to my business and the direction I see my life going as I move into the older adult space. I’ve stacked my odds as well as I can to keep all my various plates—work, life, health—spinning effectively.  

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Finish every day and be done with it; you’ve done what you can”. I love this concept. I love it so much that I’m exploring it in a subsequent blog. But, at the start of a New Year, I’d take it a step further and say, finish every year and be done with it; you’ve done what you can.

“If nothing changes, nothing changes.” Courtenay C Stevens.

It’s so easy, and often comfortable, to predict the worst. To play the fashionable victim card. Depress ourselves with interminable doomscrolling. I do believe in the concept of self-fulfilling prophesies. If we think it will be so, then likely it will be. As a species, we’re awfully good at awfulising. What if we just turned the tables with the following wind of a New Year? I’m not debating that the world is a mess; we may be going to hell in that proverbial handbasket. But there’s not a whole heap I can do about that. I can find a whole heap that’s good in my little part of it. There’s still adventure, fulfilment, and joy to be had.

My life is at a crossroads, and I’m not sure what will come at me in 2025. I’m a bit anxious, to be honest. Last year, I made significant changes to my business and the direction I see my life going as I move into the “older adult” space. I’ve stacked my odds as well as I can to keep all my various plates—work, life, health—spinning effectively.  

Finish every day and be done with it; you’ve done what you can.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have long tried to apply Emerson’s elegant psychology about accepting one’s limitations. We are so often driven by our to do lists that we don’t feel satisfied if we don’t complete them, even if there are good reasons why not. I love this concept so much that I’m exploring it in a subsequent blog. But, at the start of a New Year, I’d take it a step further and say, finish every year and be done with it; you’ve done what you can.

Ringing in 2025 with eyes wide open

Bascially, we can’t control some things, but we can control how we think and respond to the life’s shifting sands. Theoretically, it’s no harder to hope for the best than the worst. It’s just a different choice. Of course, that’s easy to say—stepping away from the hive mind of doom is often challenging. Putting my money where my mouth is, I’ve started my new year with a plan to expand on all the groundwork I did last year for my life and business, including travel plans I’ve postponed several times. So, I am ringing this New Year with excitement and the belief that whatever comes will bring adventure and growth. I wish you the same for your 2025.

Want some inspiration for 2025, why not buy my book.

In extended essays drawn from my not uncolourful life, and traversing the joys of schadenfreude, strategic gift-buying, the value of teeth, and lessons to be learnt from the Rime of the Ancient Mariner, I explore ground rules and tactics for avoiding the beige and staying highly visible. Along the way I share some takeouts and philosophies, with reference and deference to legends like George Eliot, Cleopatra, and Coco Chanel.

“Self-deprecating and revealing, perceptive and funny, Frances Manwaring’s writing, like the non-beige approach to life itself, will lead you to unexpected and exotic destinations. A delightful and entertaining read about blazing a colourful trail through life.”

Karen McMillin, Director, New Zealand Book Lovers
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Previous posts referenced in this one

May we not live in interesting times
Carpe Diem Baby!

Happy New Year … you’re under arrest!

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Two burly, unsmiling cops barge into my office and stride purposefully to my desk. “Frances Manwaring?” the taller and meaner of the barks at me. “Er … yes,” I say a little tremulously, wondering what they want. “Frances Manwaring, you’re under arrest. You have the right to remain silent … ” As the cop reels off my Miranda rights, I wonder if I’m in the middle of a nightmare. I pinch myself to be sure, but voice drones on…

OK, so I didn’t get arrested — just wanted to build the drama of the piece. But seriously, it was how I imagined things might have gone down if my business partner hadn’t gone to collect our mail from our PO Box on Tuesday. This is a rare event — nothing of any use comes by snail these days so weeks can go past without either of us stirring our stumps to go and pick up whatever dross has gathered dust. In this case it had been only been a relatively short gap since the last visit and that only because I’m in the middle of a transaction in the UK with an antediluvian, seemingly technophobic insurance company for whom physical mail, for some unfathomable reason, is the only way it will communicate.

Anyway, back comes John with a bundle of letters, mostly bank statements and the usual junk promos. While we’re on the subject, what is it with banks? Mine seem hell-bent on squandering whole forests by continuing to send paper statements, even though I’ve opted for digital versions more times than Kim Kardashian changes her handbags. But I digress — back to the main event. Because I’m hoping to find a reply from the annoying UK insurer, I don’t just lob the whole lot into the recycle bin as I often do. That’s an inspired decision as it turns out. Irritatingly, the hoped for insurance missive isn’t in the stack. Instead, lurking amongst the wad of bank statements, is a formal looking item with “OPEN IMMEDIATELY!” emblazoned on the envelope. How intriguing I think … how very Alice in Wonderland. Then I notice the Ministry of Justice crest and figure it must be something follow up from the Jury Service stint I did in early November. Being a complaint sort of person (!), I open it immediately as instructed without any concerns. But a brief first scan of the the short letter almost stopped my heart.

Nothing magical about this missive! Turns out it’s a summons to appear in court on Thursday at 11am. I’m reading it on Tuesday at about 4.50pm, so the imminence is pretty alarming. Has to be a mistake I think. Must have read it wrong. Reading it again does nothing to alter my first impression — it’s definitely a summons and it’s definitely addressed to me, so not a case of mistaken identity. And the heinous crime that requires my presence in court? A speeding infringement from mid-2016. The letter contains a helpful, but not very imaginative infographic (being MD of a creative agency, I’m quite up on what makes a good infographic) depicting the scary steps involved in the apocalypse triggered by this infringement. If you don’t pay the fine instantly, you get a reminder and some grace to stump up (Step 1). After continued ignoring of reminders (Step 2), the up the ante with a summons to court (Step 3). Failure to appear leads to arrest (Step 4).

Poorly rendered though this infographic is (note to self – send our credentials to MOJ and see if they need a new creative agency), I’m now more than a little freaked out. Us head girl types don’t get summoned to appear in court, it’s just not in our DNA! Anyway, it’s now 4.59pm and I panic dial the Ministry’s 0800 quicker than you can say Great Train Robbers to see WTF is going on and what I can do about it. I thank my lucky stars to find someone still taking calls (at a government agency) after 5pm and I have a very convivial conversation with this saintly person who clearly doesn’t think I’m an axe murderer. Having cleared that up, we quickly cut to the chase. The problem turns out to be a timing issue. I’d just moved house at about the time it happened, so didn’t receive the original fine notice (thanks whoever moved into that house after me and didn’t forward my mail). Then I didn’t notify my change of address to the powers that be before the reminder was sent out, so I also didn’t receive that (another heartfelt thank you to the new incumbent).

It was a little un-nerving how much information about my movements my new BFF was able to access while we were talking. I did vocalise somewhat stridently (not too stridently as I didn’t want to get offside with MOJ) my disappointment and surprise that only the one reminder appears to have been sent, and that there had been no subsequent communications until this summons to court more than two years later. In any case, I had to agree it was a fair cop as I hadn’t sent the change of address out immediately and it was therefore on me that the documents never found me. As you can imagine, I threw in a few mea culpas at this point. I’m sure you’ll be very happy to know that all it took to fix the problem was a credit card and $60 of creditworthiness. I certainly was! The irony of it all was that the original fine was only something like $12, the rest being penalties and court fees which couldn’t be waived because of my failure to notify change of address. However, she assures me I don’t  have to make an appearance in court appearance and the long arm of the law won’t be reaching out for me and we’re done. Phew!

Later, I pondered the astonishing amount of effort that goes into a minor misdemeanour when so much other big crime goes unchecked. That’s a story of its own, but there’s another side to this issue. I’ve moved several times in the last few years. I’m pretty diligent about sending out change of address notices to people like the Transport Authority, and I genuinely thought I had notified them all after that particular move. Apparently not. Some time ago I decided to get around this by using my business PO Box as my personal address to avoid all the hassle involved.

But my point is how easy it is to get offside with the law. Many people less advantaged than me also move a lot for all sorts of reasons, including financial or family difficulties. Many more have temporary addresses or no address. For sure, a proportion of these won’t own or drive cars, so won’t be in line to clock up traffic offences. However, I’m sure many of them do and I wonder how much of our policing time is spent arresting people who, like me, didn’t ever get the fine notices in the first place? Being generous, I’m sure most of us would actually stump up, particularly as they offer payment terms.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not arguing with the law. Curtailing the speed at which people drive makes us all safer and I do try to stay within the legal limits. I’m sure there are recidivists who never pay and deserve to be prosecuted because they clearly don’t care about the consequences. However, from this experience it’s easy to see how quickly things can escalate and suddenly you’re in trouble. I’m sure I wouldn’t actually have been banged up, but I might have landed a criminal record if I’d been convicted. I ended up thinking there but for the grace of God go I if John had postponed his trip to our PO Box by 2 days. Timing is everything! Happy New Year indeed.